I’m a Christian. One day, illness befell me who had always been healthy. I wondered at this and thought: Does God test my confidence through it?
In 2017, I got acquainted with a sister on Facebook. She often shared God’s words and hymns with me and witnessed Almighty God’s work of the last days to me. Through reading God’s words, I felt the word expressed by Almighty God has authority and power and is the voice of God. I also got to understand that God becomes flesh in the last days to express the truth and do the work of judgment for the purpose that we can be cleansed and released from the bondage of sin and won’t live in a situation of sinning in the day and confessing at night any longer. Only when we accept Almighty God’s work in the last days, pursue the truth, cast off our corrupt disposition and are purified can we enter into the kingdom of heaven. After a period of time of investigation, I was sure that Almighty God is the appearance of the Lord Jesus, so I readily accepted God’s work of the last days.
Before long, I officially joined the Church of Almighty God. Through attending gatherings and reading God’s words with brothers and sisters, I understood many truths I hadn’t understood before, and felt at ease and peaceful within. So I resolved to believe in God and read God’s words properly.
One morning, I suddenly had a sore throat after getting up. At first I thought I just got some infection of my throat and I would be all right if I drank more water. But several days later, my condition was getting worse. I felt as if something stuck in my throat.. It hurt so much that I didn’t dare to swallow when eating food or drinking water. I even coughed up particles. Then, I went to see a doctor, who only prescribed some antibiotics. Although I was still rather worried about my condition, I believed God would care for and protect me so I would be fine. After taking medicine for several days, it didn’t bring any relief to my condition. Moreover, I was unable to speak due to severe pain in my throat. So I searched on the Internet. Some people online said that I might get a tonsil stone, which gave me a bad fright. The next day, I told one of my colleagues: “I may get tonsil stone. What should I do?” After hearing this, she told me she read a piece of news some time ago, and the patient’s symptoms were similar to mine. She suggested that I should go to the hospital to have the operation. After hearing these words, I was even more afraid: What if I really have tonsil stone? After a few days, my throat didn’t get better; I also had inflammation in the corner of my eye that my eyes ached so much that I could hardly keep my eyes open. So I went to see a doctor. The doctor said it was just inflammation, and then prescribed me some antibiotics and eyedrops. But they didn’t work on me. These series of illness made me feel extreme pain. I thought: I alone work in Singapore, and have no my family by my side, and none takes care of me when I get sick. If I go to hospital for the operation, it will surely affect my work. When I was at work, the moment I thought of my illness I would weep. After I got off work and went back to my dorm, I would pour out my heart to my family with tears on the phone. At that time, I felt upset and wondered: I’ve always been in good health, and since I worked in Singapore I seldom fell ill during such a long time. But why did I get sick quite often recently? Why does God not protect me? Thinking of these, I felt miserable. I didn’t want to pray to God, nor attend meetings. I even blamed God within: Since I’ve determined to properly follow God and pursue the truth, why am I not as strong as before?
After knowing my condition, a sister fellowshiped to me: “Xiaojie, this is a spiritual struggle. Seeing that we’ve come before God and have the will to pursue the truth, Satan is unwilling to let us go easily, so it does everything to disturb us and hinder us from pursuing the truth and worshiping God. The illness we encounter is Satan’s temptation. And its scheme is for us to misunderstand God, suspect God, lose faith in God and thus betray God. We need to rely on God to see through Satan’s tricks.” She then sent a passage of God’s words to me: “God works, God cares for a person, looks upon a person, and Satan dogs His every step. Whoever God favors, Satan also watches, trailing along behind. If God wants this person, Satan would do everything in its power to obstruct God, using various evil ways to tempt, harass and wreck the work God does in order to achieve its hidden objective. What is its objective? It does not want God to have anyone; it wants all those that God wants, to possess them, control them, to take charge of them so they worship it, so they commit evil acts alongside it. Is this not Satan’s sinister motive?”
Through the sister’s fellowship and the words of God, I understood: I’ve always been healthy. And the reason why I suddenly get sick is that Satan attempts to tempt me. It uses my illness to make me live in weakness and pain. Satan’s scheme in this is to shake my resolution and faith to follow God, and to make me misunderstand God, suspect God, even betray God and then return to its reign. Satan truly is too evil and despicable. Thank God for allowing me to gain discernment of Satan’s tricks. So I prayed to God within: “Dear God, all matters and things are in Your command. Whether I will get better or not is in Your hand. I am unwilling to fall for Satan’s tricks and be harassed by it. I hope that You’ll grant me faith.” When I was determined not to be enshackled by illness anymore, and went on to normally attend meetings with brothers and sisters and read God’s words, my throat gradually got better, and so did my eyes. How wondrous and almighty God was!
One day, while I was working, I felt my trousers chafed my thigh. After I got off work and returned to my dorm, I saw there were some blisters on my thigh. At that moment, I felt afraid and wondered what was the matter with me. So I hurried to see a doctor. The doctor only said the blisters were caused by a bacterial infection and prescribed some antibiotics and ointments. After learning that I got sick again, a sister hurriedly brought me some ointments and communicated the truth to me. Thank God. From my last experience of illness I gained some knowledge of spiritual battles. My previous experience and knowledge and the sister’s concern for me made me not suffer in my heart. But several days later, seeing some of the blisters grew big, I was a bit weak and really was afraid that my illness would get even worse. At that time, the sister sent God’s words to me: “Almighty God, the Head of all things, wields His kingly power from His throne. He rules over the universe and all things and He is guiding us on the whole earth. … When sickness happens it is due to God’s love and His good intentions are surely behind it. Even when your body endures suffering, take no ideas from Satan. Praise God in the midst of illness and enjoy God in the midst of your praise. Do not lose heart in the face of illness, keep seeking and never give up, and God shall shine His light to you. How faithful was Job? Almighty God is an all-powerful physician! To dwell in sickness is to be sick, but to dwell in the spirit is to be well. If you have but one breath, God will not let you die.” God’s words gave me faith. I understood: I need to have faith in God in the midst of illness, and can’t be fooled by Satan any longer or enshackled by illness. So, I prayed to God: “O God, now I encounter illness again, but I’m not negative. Regardless of how Satan attacks me, regardless of how weak my flesh is, I won’t leave You.” Later, whenever I felt weak, I prayed to God. A few days later, these blisters on my thigh were gone unconsciously.
These two experiences gave me some understanding of Satan’s evil and despicableness, and strengthened my faith in God. Thinking back, I alone worked in Singapore and what I feared the most was illness, while Satan was just using my weakness to attack me. Satan really is too detestable. However, God’s wisdom is exercised based on Satan’s schemes. In the midst of illness, I, under the enlightenment and guidance of God’s words, experienced God’s omnipotence and dominion; I also saw that all things and matters are in God’s hand and that without God’s permission Satan dare not touch a hair of our head. So, in the midst of temptation, I’ve learned how to rely on God and stand by His side, and also gained some discernment about Satan’s schemes.
One day, during my devotionals I saw these words of God: “How many believe in Me only so I would heal them? How many believe in Me only so I would use My powers to drive unclean spirits out of their bodies? And how many believe in Me simply to receive peace and joy from Me? How many believe in Me only to demand from Me more material wealth, and how many believe in Me just to spend this life in safety and to be safe and sound in the world to come? How many believe in Me only to avoid the suffering of hell and to receive the blessings of heaven? How many believe in Me only for temporary comfort but do not seek to gain anything in the world to come? When I brought down My fury upon man and seized all the joy and peace he originally possessed, man became doubtful. When I gave unto man the suffering of hell and reclaimed the blessings of heaven, man’s shame turned into anger. When man asked Me to heal him, yet I acknowledged him not and felt abhorrence for him, man went far away from Me and sought the way of witch doctors and sorcery. When I took away all that man had demanded from Me, then all disappeared without a trace. Therefore, I say that man has faith in Me because I give too much grace, and there is far too much to gain.” The revelation in God’s words made me feel ashamed. Looking back, I saw my viewpoint of believing in God was wrong. I believed in order to be blessed and to receive grace from God. So when encountering illness, I didn’t seek the truth to obey God, but instead made a demand of God, hoping that He could cure me of my illness. And I believed that since I had believed in God, I should receive His care and protection. Therefore, when God’s work didn’t match my notions, I complained to Him and even gave rise to doubts about Him. Through this, I realized: I had no true faith in God, much less had love toward Him. The purpose of God expressing words and bestowing the truth upon us in the last days is to cleanse and change us mankind and to allow us to break free from the bondage of sin. If my believing in God isn’t pursuing the truth, casting off my corrupt disposition or eventually obeying God and loving God, then my belief will be in vain. After realizing my wrong viewpoint, I prayed to God silently: “O God! That I can accept Your work of the last days really is Your great blessing for me. Though I believe in You, I conduct transactions with You. This truly wounds Your heart. I am willing to turn my wrong views around. From now on, I am willing to only pay attention to pursuing the truth and practicing the truth in order to satisfy You, and not willing to pursue blessing or grace. No matter what happens in the future, I will learn to submit to You and perform the duty that a creature ought to perform to repay Your love.”
By Xiaojie
