By Minghui
In 2015, a friend passed on to me the gospel of the kingdom of God. Through her fellowships, I came to know that there is only one true God among the heavens and earth and all things, that He created the universe and all things and meanwhile He also rules over and controls all things, and that the prospect and fate of every one of us are ruled and arranged by Him. Later, I accepted God’s work in the last days. And then I began to lead a church life and perform duty in the church. Just as I was full of confidence in following God, Satan’s temptations befell me.
One day, my elder son broke his arm while playing sports. His arm was put in a cast after we sent him to the hospital. Later after a CT scan, the doctor said the broken bone was not set properly and therefore it might need a surgery. On hearing this, I was very worried and afraid, for his blood vessels might be injured during the surgery, which might put his life in danger. The more I thought about it, the more I felt suffocated as if a stone was put on my heart. At this time, I became a little negative, thinking: Why do I encounter these things since I have believed in God? Is my faith wrong? Immediately following, my two-year-old son went down with a fever, and it lasted for over a week. Moreover, his whole body was covered with roseola, his mouth festered, and his hands and feet were swollen. After the examination, the doctor said that he had Kawasaki Disease. At the sight of his suffering, I felt a heart wrenching pain and could not understand why things like this befell my family continuously. It was reasonable to say that I should have God’s protection and peace and should not have encountered these mishaps after I have believed in Him. Therefore, I began to doubt God in my heart.
Just when I was full of confusion, a sister and her husband, who is also a believer, came to the hospital to visit us. When I saw them, I told them about my son’s condition. Then the sister fellowshiped with me: “When God does His work to save us, Satan deceives and disturbs us using all kinds of schemes. Through harming our family and attacking our weak points, Satan attempts to make us doubt and deny God, destroying our relationship with Him. However, no matter how treacherous Satan’s scheme is, we must believe firmly that everything is in God’s hand. Just like the word of God says: ‘Of everything that occurs in the universe, there is nothing that I do not have the final say in. What exists that is not in My hands? All that I say goes …’ God is the Lord of all creation, the universe and all things as well as Satan are all in His hands, in which Satan is nothing but a chess piece. He allows its temptations to befall us, this contains His good intentions: He is using Satan to do service for His work. Through this He tests whether our belief in Him is true.” After that, she also fellowshiped to me about God’s will of saving man and that we should have faith in God and bear witness for Him while encountering Satan’s temptations. Through her fellowship, I came to understand a little bit of God’s work, and at the same time I had seen Satan’s viciousness: It thinks up every conceivable means to prevent me from following God. I didn’t want to be fooled by it any more. So I came before God and prayed: “God, because I was foolish and ignorant and didn’t know You, when Satan’s temptations befell, I misunderstood and complained about You. I am truly blind. God, now I am willing to put my sons into Your hands. No matter what the outcome will be, I will not complain any more. I am willing to obey Your orchestration and arrangement.” After praying, I felt much peaceful and assured in the heart.
Later, during gathering, a sister read me another passage from the word of God: “God works, God cares for a person, looks upon a person, and Satan dogs His every step. Whoever God favors, Satan also watches, trailing along behind. If God wants this person, Satan would do everything in its power to obstruct God, using various evil ways to tempt, harass and wreck the work God does in order to achieve its hidden objective. What is its objective? It does not want God to have anyone; it wants all those that God wants, to possess them, control them, to take charge of them so they worship it….” She fellowshiped: “From God’s word, we can see that the temptations which befall us are actually a spiritual fight. God expresses His words in His work to save us from Satan’s harm, letting us no longer live under the dark influence of Satan and enabling us to receive His care and protection. However, Satan does not let us go easily. It uses every means to tempt and disturb us, attempting to make us oppose and betray God and ultimately be destroyed along with it. God is almighty and wise. He appropriates Satan’s temptation to make us gain discernment of its evil essence and see through its ugliness, enabling us to reject and betray it. Just like the time when Satan tempted Job, it used the most vicious means to harm him: It not only seized all his possessions and children, but tortured and afflicted him, causing sore boils all over his body and letting him suffer the pain which was unbearable for common man. However, Job still maintained his faith in God and did not complain to Him all along. It’s just like what he said: ‘The LORD gave, and the LORD has taken away; blessed be the name of the LORD.’ ‘Shall we receive good at the hand of God, and shall we not receive evil?’ His faith in God was without trade or demands. No matter whether God bestowed on him or took from him, he obeyed all of God’s orchestration and arrangements and stood witness for Him.”
Immediately after, she read me another passage of God’s word: “What you pursue is to be able to gain peace after believing in God—for your children to be free from illness, for your husband to have a good job, for your son to find a good wife, for your daughter to find a decent husband, for your oxen and horses to plough the land well, for a year of good weather for your crops. This is what you seek. Your pursuit is only to live in comfort, for no accidents to befall your family, for the winds to pass you by, for your face to be untouched by grit, for your family’s crops to not be flooded, for you to be unaffected by any disaster, to live in God’s embrace, to live in a cozy nest.” She then fellowshiped: “God’s word reveals our false perspective on faith. We do not believe in Him so as to pursue the truth and gain life, but make a deal with Him and demand blessings from Him. We only focus on receiving grace and peace in our belief in Him. Therefore, whenever unfavorable things, tribulations or disasters befall us or our family, we will complain to Him and deny Him, or even betray Him. Actually, God expressing all the truths for the salvation of man is to enable us to gain the truth and knowledge of Him.” After hearing her fellowship, I began to reflect: I indeed have been corrupted by Satan to the extent that I am without any humanity and reason. Having been affected by Satan’s poison “Heaven destroys those who are not for themselves”, I only concern about my own personal benefit or loss. My faith in God is all about making a deal with Him, demanding grace and blessings from Him, and demanding His protection for my family so that we can live in peace and safety without a hitch or disaster. Once my own benefit suffered, I complained about God and thought that He should have kept and protected me and my family after I believed in Him, and that no disaster should befall my family. At the realization of this, I came to see that: I am so selfish and despicable. I am truly someone who would not get up early if it was not for a benefit. God is the Lord of all creation. As a created being, I shall worship and obey God, and I am utterly unqualified to make demands on Him. I should turn around my false perspective on faith. So then I prayed to God: “God, I am willing to commit my children into Your hands and obey Your sovereignty and arrangements. No matter what the outcome will be, I am willing to obey, with no individual choice or requirement.” After praying, I felt peaceful in the heart.
However, Satan’s temptation befell still. Later, my son was not able to drink, nor did he want to eat, and then suddenly injections did not work either. At that time, I could not help but get nervous and grieve. It seemed that he was in a dangerous condition. Flustered and in pain, I thought of God suddenly and remembered God’s word which a sister had fellowshiped with me: “You should know that all things in the environment around you are there by My permission, I arrange it all. See clearly and satisfy My heart in the environment I have given to you. Do not fear, Almighty God of hosts will surely be with you; He has your back and He is your Shield.” It’s true. What shall I be afraid of with God as my rear guard? I cannot fall into Satan’s trickery and lose my faith in God. I should rely on Him and look up to Him. Hence, I prayed to God: “God, all things and matters as well as our fate are all in Your hand. May You give me faith and strength. I am willing to entrust my children to You and obey Your sovereignty and arrangements.” The following days, I prayed to God at all times and focused on quieting my heart before Him. Through a series of treatment, including having injections and taking medicines, my son’s condition was improving. A few days later, he was fully recovered and discharged from hospital. I then saw God’s miraculous deeds.
Through this experience, I have experienced God’s almightiness and reality, and moreover, I also have come to understand His almightiness and wisdom, seeing that His wisdom is exercised based on Satan’s plots. Satan corrupts and abuses us, but God uses its trickery as a service to enable us to discern its trickery and ultimately abandon it and then give our hearts to Him. Thank God for setting up this kind of environment. I have gained plenty. All glory be to Almighty God!
